so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
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