How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
ok first of all what the fuck
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize