this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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