i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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