I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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