Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize