things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Randomize
