let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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