Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
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