Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize