We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Randomize
