Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize