trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
