i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
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