I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
