Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
