where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
