I'm lost and stupid without you.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Randomize