for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
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