he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
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