Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....