Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
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