one two three fourrrrnication!
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize