So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
