one two three fourrrrnication!
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Randomize