**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize