it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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