I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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