shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
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