that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Randomize
