Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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