I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Randomize
