If you die in college, do you die in real life?
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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