great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
