I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
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