Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
