oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
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