We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I cannot find my penis.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
A+ Viking dick
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
