what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
