he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
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