GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
