Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
