I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
