I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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