Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
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