i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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