no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
