My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
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