I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Randomize