I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
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