After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
