Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
