I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
