I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
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